The story is that a panda walks into a restaurant and orders food. After he eats, he shoots a gun in the air and heads for the exit. The restaurant owner is appalled and asked why the panda would do such a thing.

That’s when the panda throws him a dictionary and asks him to look up the meaning of the word panda. In it, the dictionary says “panda: eats shoots and leaves.” Unfortunately, the panda misread it as “panda: eats, shoots and leaves.”

You’re right in noting that the Globe & Mail used a punctuation in a very clever way. The punctuation in the headline implies instead of reports. Thank goodness we can resort to blogs and podcasts to get another perspective.